So I went to Outback with Somnang yesterday, trying to treat ourselves a good lunch before she is heading back to California. The steak was really good, Outback is really a good steak house.
We enjoyed our meals and talked about guys in our life.
I told Somnang that I had a feeling that Tony already changed his phone and didn't let me know his new phone number. I said, I would be so disappointed if it was truth. Somnang said Tony should not be that type of guy that I thought he would be. Well, reality check? I called his number today, and his number is no long in service! My mood was way down to the mud. Our past relationship didn't mean anything to him? Now he owed me money and just ran away from me? Or is there any reason that he had to change number in the last minute and forgot to save my number to let me know?! I was furious. I even thought of driving to his house and knock on his door! This is not a small money, and there is no way that I can let him slide! I already let him hold the payment back for so many years!!! And I have to pay all the bills plus interest!! I am so mad.
It is hard to keep everything inside, Cu would be mad if he knew the truth. Somnang is enjoying her vacation few thousands miles away in her hometown. I really don't want to bring anybody down.
What can I say? Trusted wrong person in my life? God, am I wrong? To let my loved one to borrow money when he needed it the most?
It's still haunting me these days... Sometimes I am still hesitating if I should give my money to Cu when his payment is late. But Cu is my husband now, I am telling myself. I should trust him. I always trusted everybody in my life. So please, don't take my faith from it. I want to trust and believe.
And I pray... Tony will find me and return the money to me. Should I go to find him? I never "chase" money from others... So, can he be the one who takes the step? The fact is, he is the one who owes me the money.
I'm hurt.
祈祷
善有善报
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